- Murphy's
First Law: Nothing is as easy as it looks.
- Murphy's
Second Law: Everything takes longer than you think.
- Murphy's
Third Law: In any field of scientific endeavor, anything that can go
wrong will go wrong.
- Murphy's
Fourth Law: If there is a possibility of several things going wrong,
the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go
wrong.
- Murphy's
Fifth Law: If anything just cannot go wrong, it will anyway.
- Murphy's
Sixth Law: If you perceive that there are four possible ways in which a
procedure can go wrong and circumvent these, then a fifth way,
unprepared for, will promptly develop.
- Murphy's
Seventh Law: Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to
worse.
- Murphy's
Eighth Law: If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously
overlooked something.
- Murphy's
Ninth Law: Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
- Murphy's Tenth Law: It is impossible to make anything
foolproof, because
fools are so ingenious.
- O'Toole's Commentary on Murphy's Laws: Murphy was an
optimist.
- Rudy's First Rule on Holes: When you find yourself in
a hole stop digging.
- Weiler's Law: Nothing is impossible for the man who
doesn't have to do it himself.
- Nowlan's
Theory: He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the
next freeway exit.
- Van
Roy's Law: Honesty is the best policy - there's less
competition.
- Van
Roy's Truism: Life is a whole series of circumstances beyond your
control.
- Agnes'
Law: Almost everything in life is easier to get into than out
of.
- Clarke's
Conclusion: Never let your sense of morals interfere with doing the
right thing.
- Goda's
Truism: By the time you get to the point where you can make ends meet,
somebody moves the ends.
- Johnny
Carson's Observation: The smallest interval of time known to man is
that which occurs in Manhattan between the traffic signal turning green
and the taxi driver behind you blowing his horn.
- Golub's Laws of Project Execution:
a) Fuzzy project objectives are used to avoid the embarrassment of
estimating the corresponding costs.
b) A carelessly planned project takes three times longer to complete
than expected; a carefully planned project takes only twice as long.
c) The effort required to correct course increases geometrically with
time.
d) Project teams detest weekly progress reporting because it so vividly
manifests their lack of progress.
- The
Phone Booth Rule: A lone quarter always gets the number nearly
right.
- Thornton's N-1 Rule: When attempting to recall a
memorized list of N items, you will remember only N-1 items.
Corollary to Thornton's
N-1 Rule: If you attempt to recall the same
list ten minutes later, the missing item will be different.
-
Rule
of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem, it always
helps if you
know the answer.
- Zall's Laws:
1) Any time you get a mouthful of hot
soup, the next thing you do will
be wrong.
2) How long a minute is, depends on which side of
the bathroom door
you're on.
- Ettore's
Observation: The other line moves faster.
- McPhearson's Observation: The probability of anything
happening is in inverse ratio to its desirability.
- Griffin's
Thought: When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves
last.
- Manly's
Maxim: Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion
with confidence.
- Pudder's Laws:
a) Anything that begins well ends badly.
b) Anything that begins badly ends worse.
- Cann's
Axiom: When all else fails, read the instructions.
- Macaluso's
Doctrine: You've never been as sick as just before you stop
breathing.
- Troutman's Postulate for Computer Programming:
- Profanity is the one language understood by all programmers.
- Not until a program has been in production for six months will the
most harmful error be discovered.
- Job control instructions that positively cannot be arranged in
improper order will be.
- Interchangeable routines won't.
- If the input editor has been designed to reject all bad input, an
ingenious idiot will discover a method to get bad data past it.
- If a test installation functions perfectly, all subsequent systems
will malfunction.
- Lubarsky's Law of Cybernetic Entomology: There's
always one more bug.
- Sattinger's Law: It works better if you plug it
in.
- The
Law of Selective Gravity, or the Buttered-Side Down Law: An object will
fall so as to do the most damage.
- Stale's
Law: No matter how careful one is in resealing the inner liner in a
cereal box, it will tear where it is glued to the box.
- Rubitusky's Law: Any inanimate object, regardless of
its position, configuration or purpose, may be expected to perform at
any time in a totally unexpected manner for reasons that are either
entirely obscure or else completely mysterious.
- William's
Law: There is
no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute
strength and ignorance.
- Horner's Five Thumb Postulate: Experience varies
directly with equipment ruined.
- Westheimer's Rule – To estimate the time it takes to
do a task:
Estimate the time you think it should take, multiply by two and change
the unit of measure to the next highest unit. Thus, we allocate two
days for a one hour task.
- Brooke's Law: Adding manpower to a late project makes
it later.
a.k.a. The Nine Pregnant Women will not get you a baby in One
Month Law.
- Finagle's Fourth Law: Once a job is fouled up,
anything done to improve it will only make it worse.
- Featherkile's Explanation: Whatever you did, that's
what you planned.
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